Fun with Telemarketers!

Over in the phone, I sold photo packages for a national studio...for one day. I was twenty and needed the work.  Most people just ended the call without comment; others were very clear in sharing their disgust at my invasion. Eight hours of cold-call telemarketing was more than enough for me.  I sold nothing, and grew so very, very tired of the script that I was commanded to follow verbatim.  "Follow the script, and you'll sell." I followed the script, and I ran!

These days, I receive only 1 or 2 calls a month from businesses trying to earn my dollar (thank you No Call List!), and I am so very sympathetic to the plight of the phone salesperson, but...I can't stand the lack of creativitiy in their pitch.  I can feel their lack of interest even before they say anything, which has led me to a very fun game and the topic of this week's Spark: Create a response to a telemarketer (selling anything--credit card counseling, computer repair, alarm systems) that would keep the invasive caller on the phone while making any stand-by listeners laugh.  I've entertained my family at length by dragging out a dead sales pitch well past the point of the the caller's script or desire to close the sale.

It may seem cruel, but it can be a fun source for exploring your inner "dunce."  Good luck!

Holiday Tales

One of my favorite parts of Christmas is the stories.  Rudolph, Frosty, Jack Frost, Santa...there are just so many fun tales based around the mysteries of the North Pole.

Over the years, I have written a few short stories that build on "Santa lore".  I created an entire university in Alaska that was totally populated by elves in training, and then detailed an academic debate about the technology behind Rudolph's nose (my father was confused as to why I would do this, but that's okay).  Last year I wrote a story about Lenny the Elf, who aspired to be Santa's personal chef.  These stories are one to two thousand words, and appeal to the kid in us.

What character could you create to enhance the popular Christmas-time mythology?  Take a few minutes and put together a character biography for one of the side-characters in the North Pole.  Then detail a way that they contribute to Santa's efforts.  Maybe they saved Christmas one year?  Maybe their contribution is not so glamourous, but still important.

Have fun with it!

Holiday Discomfort!

We all just finished up Thanksgiving with all its trimmings: feasting and family.  Many of us have that one family member or friend that just loves to stir up trouble.  In my family it is [MESSAGE REDACTED].  Ha!  That person is the worst!

This Weekly Spark (my first!) is based off that family member.

Write five lines or statements that are guaranteed to cause you trouble if spoken at a family holiday gathering.

Take your time and build off of experience.

Post your examples below.  Good luck and have fun!

So You Want to be a Writer?

So you want to be a writer?  I've got some good news--you are one story, one poem, or one song away from making your dream come true!  How is that?  Well, writers write. 

Let me rephrase that--if you want to be a writer, write.  And I'm here to help.

The Weekly Spark is a place where anyone can kick start the writing process. Each week on Monday morning, The Weekly Spark will provide you with an exercise or challenge meant to inspire you to write.  Some weeks it may be a list of ideas, some weeks it may be one simple suggestion.  These may be influenced by the season, current events, or just a piece of rotten potato I ate the previous evening. 

Some of us attend writers groups to find this inspiration, or subscribe to magazines, and these are all great.  I personally enjoy the interactive nature of a monthly group, Red Dirt Writers (http://www.reddirtwriters.org/). 

From time to time, I may share some of my own experiences as a writer.  I have recently published a book I co-authored with my daugher, Anna.  It is a children's fiction novel called "The Pirate Bride" (http://www.thepiratebride.com/).  You can check out Anna's blog, Write On! at http://www.anna-mckinley.blogspot.com/

So thanks for following The Weekly Spark!  Happy writing!